he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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