Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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