8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize