I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I wish life had little blips of pornography
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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