There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize