I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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