he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
