shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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