I murdered the dance floor call the cops
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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