Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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