doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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