what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
