How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
Randomize
