the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Randomize
