I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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