I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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