dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
