This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
