I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
