On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
