So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
