Dual....:-)
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Randomize