feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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