yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
