you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
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