So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
I wish life had little blips of pornography
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
