He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
cat food counts as protein by the way
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
