We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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