We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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