You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Randomize
