Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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