i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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