the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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