gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
