Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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