If i could tip my vagina, i would.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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