It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
