Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
So many bounce houses so little time
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
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