I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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