I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
