I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
