I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize