Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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