okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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