he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
