Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
there was a trapeze. enough said
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
