Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Randomize
