you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Randomize
