Plan B is the new Plan A
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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