shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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